A day in the life of a beach bum.

No posts recently because I've been SO BUSY doing lots of work to earn money for future adventures; when I've got a spare hour you're more likely to find me on the beach/by the pool with a bevvie than tapping away about how tired my legs are after another 12 hour day... I know, I know, get the tiny violins out.

I actually wrote most of this over a week ago and didn't find the time to finish it off. Nothing much has changed, other than now it's sometimes too hot to go to the beach. Seriously.

Anyway, all the days here seem to run into one another so I thought I'd give you an insight into my beach bum existence. Here is a summary of my average day:

07.15 Alarm goes off. Snooze.

07.20 Alarm again. Curse the world. Snooze alarm.

07.25 Snooze alarm.

07.30 I can skip breakfast. Snooze alarm.

07.35 Snooze alarm.

07.40 Do deals with self about going to bed early. Snooze alarm.

07.45 Snooze alarm. Then check the time. Realise how many times snooze has been pressed. Jump up, hit head on top bunk and fall onto floor in a tangle of sheets.

07.46 Discover I've become deaf overnight. Shit! What did I have for dinner....?

07.48 Remember I wear ear plugs. Idiot. Not deaf. Just dumb.

07.50 Get dressed in usual cleaning attire of denim shorts, baggy polo shirt and grumpy morning face. Brush teeth, then ruin minty freshness with coffee made from two dessert spoons of instant. Remember the days of £4 starbucks with misty eyes.

08.03 Walk into hostel kitchen. Try to work out who has left the mess. Plot revenge. Start to clean.

08.47 Silently curse all the backpackers who are now making the kitchen dirty again. Smile to their faces. Plot revenge.

09.13 Assure people that I don't mind them walking across the floor I've spent the last half an hour cleaning. Plot revenge.

09.30 Crack. Decide to have breakfast. depending on level of alcohol consumption this is
either vegemite on toast or cereal. Have a moan to new arrivals about how sleepy you are, despite general 'I-live-by-the-beach' smugness.

10.00 Start cleaning dorms. Plot revenge on all those who fail to take the sheets off beds when they check out.

10.47 Realise should probably stop gossiping to Stacey/Louise on reception and get cleaning finished on time.

11.05 Hop in shower. Whack on some face power and a slick of mascara. Put on work top. Walk the long 2 minute commute.

11.29 What is the point in showering when I'm back to 'sweaty and disgusting' after two minutes in this heat?

11.30 Work. Serve lunches, make drinks. Chat. Search and listen to songs on the music database. Stock some fridges. Eat food. Drink coffee.

15.00 Run back to hostel. Put on bikini. Slap on suncream. Put kindle in it's posh protective case (ikea sandwich bag).

15.08 Relax. Ahhhh, the beach. Put sunglasses on to optimise perving success. Pretend to read book. Admire the scenery. Realise book is quite good, actually, and forget about boys.

15.40 Too hot. Swim time. Ahhhh. Bath like sea. Lovely, though marred by possibility of death by stinger/shark/crocodile/stingray.

17.00 Go back. Shower, dress, ablute &c. Head to work.

18.00 Work. Work, workity work. Serve drinks. Try not to muck up people's food orders. Talk to friends. Resist urge to consume caffine. Eat yummy dinner. Clean. Knock off drink.

22.30 Home. One more drink can't hurt, it'll help me sleep.

23.00 Sure, I'll come to the Shrubbery for a drink. Why not?

23.16 Who bought that sambuca? No I will NOT drink the sambuca!

23.17 Sambuca is disgusting.

23.20 Sambuca is amazing. Who bought me more wine?

00.48 Blargh, sleeps time. I'll go to bed early tomorrow, honest.

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